Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Are they not making soap like they used to?

My Reagan, who is not yet 5, sometimes likes to say words that are not so lovely. Not cuss words or BAD words, more along the lines of bathroom words- if you know what I mean. He really thinks it's quite funny and the kids and I are pretty tired of it. So last night, the older kids came in the kitchen and told me "Mom, he's saying those words again." Okay, what am I going to do about this bad habit of his? I need to do something! Shaking my head sorrowfully and with a shocked tone of voice I said,
"Oh Reagan, now your mouth is dirty and I have to wash it out. Come over to the sink."
"It's dirty?" he asked with surprise.
"Yes, I need to wash it clean because you've been saying yucky words."
"Okay."
He calmly walked over to the kitchen sink. (He's taking this better than I thought he would. Isn't he supposed to be showing signs of trepidation at this point?)
I boosted him up to the sink and put a squirt of Ultra Concentrate Dawn on his tongue and then started wiping it around. (Okay.... still no reaction. When are the signs of disgust supposed to start?)
Finally, I turned the faucet on for the rinse cycle and proceeded to finish Reagan's tongue bath, which is all that I feel I've accomplished by this point.
I put him down and asked "Are you going to say naughty words anymore?"
"No.....Mom does it look clean now?" He opened his mouth for me to inspect while I tried hard not to laugh.
Then as he left, Reagan said to me, without a trace of cheekiness, "Mom, that soap tasted good!"
I think this whole little exercise didn't quite work out the way it was supposed to....when did soap start tasting good?

16 comments:

Kristy Lou said...

Oh no! The new generation of soap-resistance! My friend told me the same story--she wanted to teach a lesson to her son by "washing his mouth out with soap". He didn't flinch and said that it tasted good! What??? I think she used hand soap. I told her I would bring over some good old Meleluca bar soap--that stuff should be nasty to taste! Either that or our kids have subconsciously built up a resistance--maybe a mutated cell in their genetic structure. It would make a good Dr. Who episode, no?

mitzi said...

At least it seems that he was concerned that his mouth was dirty--maybe that will be enough to make him think before he does it again. You would think they would make stuff like that taste awful so little kids/babies would be adverse to drinking it and poisoning themselves.

Gnomie said...

It could be all the years of soap therapy, passed down from your parents, to you, to us, that gave us the soap resistant gene.

The Mayo Family said...

Oh that stinks! My mom used to put hot sauce on our tongues, but she always seemed to run out when it'd happen to me ;) So instead she made me bite into a bar of dial soap, YUCK! Let me tell you it worked like a charm.

Its just me said...

oh Sariah..your post made me laugh..it shouldnt taste good. Maybe try the instant foaming kind next time. My Kids seem to not enjoy that at all. It gets in around the whole mouth instead of just the tongue.
I like the comment posted above. Maybe shes right about a mutated cell...I have heard though, that bar soap seems to be more effective.
Let me know how round 2 goes with the soap. Its so hard to keep from laughing when they say some of these things. :0)

MisoMama said...

Sariah,
This is hilarious! One mom shared at our last homeschool meeting a trick she uses to keep her kids from fighting.
She keeps apple cider vinegar in a spray bottle and any time they use words that would potentially leave bitterness in a sibling's heart she lets them feel the bitterness on their tongue.
Her reasoning was: "Apple cider vinegar is so good for you, just give me half a reason!"
I threatened it one day and said I wasn't nice enough to use a spray bottle and got out a Tablespoon. The threat was enough.

The Morrill's said...

I LOVE it! I'm still lauging. That is too funny. I hope he didn't enjoy the tongue bath to the point that he would want you to do it again. :) See you Saturday!!

lawdy said...

Excellent. Excellent. tooooo funny. I haven't done that for a while and it was successful for me--bar soap doesn't taste good. I had forgotten about that--gonna have to try it with my "potty" mouth three year old.

DJyavin said...

I still remember when my mom said that to me, I unfortunately had not developed this soap resistant gene.

EllaJac said...

Haha! Maybe go with a bar of Ivory and do it Christmas Story style - sit with the bar inserted for awhile? :D

Mandy said...

I think that if it was my child, he would notice that it smelled good, and tell me that it tasted good, just to irk me. Could he have maybe thought this through? I wonder. . .

Tana said...

Why not try out the new line of alcohol based germ killing products like Purell, that would fix the soap resistant gene for sure. I shudder just thinking about it.

Good story, I'm so glad you posted it!

Kevin and Beth said...

Very funny, loved your story!
Beth

Manda said...

Bar soap is required, I believe - it usually tastes nasty (not that I go around trying out how they taste), but more than that - it sticks between your teeth so you taste it for a long time - and if you try and brush it out, it just foams up and brings out the taste even more. Not that that happened to me...I must've read it somewhere.

Hava said...

Sariah, that was HILARIOUS!!!! I was laughing so hard, Doug started asking, "What? What?" so I read it outloud to him, and he laughed uproariously. Reagan is a hoot.

Havs

mini-man said...

Mom you know, someday that little reagyboogers is gonna turn 5, then he won't say bathroom words